Let’s start with the most classic relationship meltdown line ever:
“You just don’t understand me!”
Sound familiar?
Whether you’re a woman feeling unseen or a man feeling attacked for doing “nothing wrong,” chances are high that you’ve either said this or heard it. And the worst part? The more you try to explain yourself, the more misunderstood you feel.
So, what if I told you… it’s not about the person. It’s about the template.
Let’s break this down, human-style. No fluff. Just clarity.
What Are Energetic Templates?
Every soul has a basic energetic blueprint. Think of it like an operating system: iOS or Android, Windows or Mac. Now, translate that into masculine and feminine energy templates.
It has NOTHING to do with gender. A man can carry feminine energy. A woman can be more masculine in her energetic design. But in relationships, especially romantic ones, the traditional male-female templates play out the loudest.
The Male Template: Purpose, Logic, Fix-It Mode
Men, energetically, are wired to protect, provide, solve. Their love language? Often silent actions.
You cry. He hands you a tissue. You say, “I’m sad.” He replies, “What should we do about it?”
To a feminine template, this feels cold. But to him? He’s SHOWING UP for you.
I had a client, Rina, who kept saying, “My husband never talks to me. He doesn’t care about my emotions.” When we dived deeper in an Akashic session, we saw he was showing care by ensuring bills were paid, kids were safe, and she had a support system. He thought that was enough. Because in his energetic template, doing is loving.
The Female Template: Expression, Emotion, Connection
Women, in their core energetic design, thrive on feeling heard, being emotionally met, and connecting deeply.
So when a woman says, “I feel anxious,” she doesn’t want a solution. She wants presence. Eye contact. Empathy.
Men interpret this as “nagging” or “complaining.” Because their system is scanning for problems to fix. If there’s no fix, they short-circuit.
Template Clash 101: The Root of Most Relationship Pain
You: “Why don’t you open up?” Partner: “Why do you need to talk about everything?”
You: “I need emotional connection.” Partner: “I need some space.”
Sound like polar opposites? That’s the design.
But it’s not a flaw. It’s the whole point.
The universe pairs you with your “template opposite” NOT to torture you, but to help you heal, grow, and complete karmic patterns.
Let me share a fun story.
A client, Sameer, came to me fuming. “My girlfriend is so clingy. I feel suffocated!” We did an energetic scan. Guess what? Sameer was carrying a hyper-masculine template where vulnerability felt unsafe. His girlfriend? Embodying pure feminine energy that wanted emotional intimacy.
Instead of dumping her, he learned to sit with discomfort and slowly open up. Today, they’re stronger than ever.
Templates Are Not Excuses, They’re Maps
Let me be blunt. Understanding energetic templates isn’t about justifying bad behavior.
If someone is being toxic, manipulative, abusive—that’s not their template, that’s their wound.
But if someone is behaving in a pattern that annoys you or confuses you, before blaming them, ask yourself:
“Is this their energetic design or their emotional immaturity?”
Understanding templates helps you separate projection from reality. You stop making up stories like:
“He doesn’t love me.”
“She just wants to control me.”
And instead start asking:
“What energy is playing out here?”
“How can I meet them without losing myself?”
Templates Aren’t Permanent Labels
We all carry both masculine and feminine energies. The dance is in balance.
During motherhood, a woman might swing deeply into her feminine. During crisis, she might access her masculine to “hold things together.”
A man might operate from purpose at work, but come home and soften into emotion with his child.
Templates are fluid. The goal isn’t to change your partner. It’s to understand their template enough to stop personalizing their behavior.
Pain Point: "He pulled away when I got closer."
Classic template reaction.
When feminine energy comes closer emotionally, masculine energy sometimes pulls away to regain space. It’s not rejection. It’s regulation.
But the feminine interprets it as abandonment. Cue emotional chaos.
Solution? Stop chasing. Let him breathe. And use that space to connect with your OWN template’s need for expression—through journaling, dance, self-reflection.
Pain Point: "She’s too emotional, I can’t handle it."
To the masculine template, intensity = threat. So when the feminine gets expressive (read: emotional storm), the masculine panics.
Men, here’s a tip: Don’t fix her. Just witness her.
Say, “I hear you,” or “I’m here for you,” and see how fast she calms down.
The Akashic Truth: You Chose This Clash
Here’s the spiritual mic-drop:
Before incarnating, you CHOSE a partner whose template would trigger your wounds.
Why? Because your soul wanted evolution. Not comfort.
Every time you hit friction in a relationship, your soul whispers, “Here’s a chance to expand.”
In Akashic Records, I often see soul contracts between lovers where one is the masculine anchor, the other the feminine healer. When they resist, pain multiplies. When they align, healing is rapid.
So, What Can You Do Now?
Stop Blaming. Start Noticing.
Is it a clash of templates or values?
Have the Hard Conversations.
Say: “I think we process things differently. Can we explore that instead of judging it?”
Explore Your Own Template.
Are you leading with emotion or logic? Do you push or withdraw?
Get Curious, Not Controlling.
Ask your partner: “What helps you feel seen and safe?”
Use Tools. Real Tools.
Not Instagram quotes. I’m talking deep energetic tools that decode your karmic blueprint.
From My Toolbox: Karmic Oracle Healing Cards
If you’re someone who’s tired of repeating the same relational patterns… If you’re constantly attracting the “same person in different bodies”… If you want clarity without years of therapy…
My Karmic Oracle Healing Cards are created to help you decode your emotional entanglements, energetic patterns, and past life contracts—in 10 minutes or less.
Each card isn’t just a message. It’s a mirror. And sometimes, what you need isn’t advice. It’s a reflection.
Final Words: Choose Understanding Over Ego
So today, instead of sending that angry text, take a breath. Instead of shutting down, open a new conversation.
Maybe your partner isn’t wrong. Maybe their template is just different.
And maybe, just maybe, that difference is the very thing your soul came here to learn from.
With clarity and a smirk,
Neha Singhal
Spiritual Psychologist | Akashic Mentor | Mystic Poet I Author
P.S. Want to decode your current relationship pattern? Pull a card from the Karmic Oracle Healing Deck and watch your story shift.