Why Am I So Scared of Getting Married?

Why Am I So Scared of Getting Married?- By Neha Singla Akashic Reader

Let me start with a real story from one of my sessions.

She sat across from me, tears quietly tracing her cheeks, and whispered, “Neha, he’s perfect on paper. Loving, stable, kind. But every time he talks about marriage, something inside me wants to run. Am I broken? Why am I so scared of getting married?”

My love, if you’ve ever asked this question, welcome to this sacred conversation. You’re not alone, and you’re not broken.

In fact, this fear is far more common than we speak about — especially in a society like ours that has painted marriage as the ultimate destination of love.

But what if your soul is whispering something deeper? Let’s go there.

A Quick Glance at the Bigger Picture

Before we go deeply personal, let’s understand this in a broader, more factual context:

According to the National Family Health Survey (NFHS-5), the average age of marriage in urban India has risen significantly in the past decade. More people are delaying or avoiding marriage.
Globally, 42–45% of marriages end in divorce in countries like the U.S. and U.K.
Even in India, where cultural expectations are different, urban divorce rates have seen a 45% increase over the past 10 years.

People are pausing. Reflecting. And sometimes — resisting.

And that resistance isn’t always fear. It can also be wisdom.

Let’s Start With You: What Are You Really Feeling?

If we were sitting across from each other, I wouldn’t first give you answers. I’d ask you questions.

What does marriage represent to you?
Who did you first see being married?
What were your earliest memories of “married couples”?
Do you feel you’d lose yourself in marriage?
Do you think love and freedom can co-exist?

We think we’re afraid of the marriage. But more often, we’re afraid of what we think marriage will make us become.

And those ideas? They didn’t originate from you. They were absorbed.

From your mother. From society. From a heartbreak. From that one friend who changed after she became someone’s wife.

Your fear might not be fear. It might be stored memory.

The Psychology Behind the Fear

Let’s decode this a bit.

1. Fear of Losing Identity

A LOT of women (especially high-functioning, self-aware ones like you) fear marriage because they equate it with dissolving their individuality.

“Will I have to compromise who I am?”

Especially if you’ve fought hard to become who you are, the idea of blending your life with someone else’s might feel like regression.

2. Fear of Repeating Past Patterns

If you’ve seen dysfunctional marriages growing up, your inner child might be whispering:

“Don’t go there. It’s not safe.”

Your nervous system doesn’t distinguish between past and present. It only knows patterns.

3. Fear of Abandonment or Betrayal

Some fears aren’t about the partner. They’re about the possibility of pain:

“What if he cheats?”
“What if it ends?”
“What if I love more than I am loved?”

These are survival fears, not romantic ones.

4. Perfectionism Paralysis

In the age of curated love stories on Instagram, marriage feels like a stage you must get perfect.

“What if I mess it up?” “What if I choose wrong?”

So you freeze. You delay. You avoid.

Let’s Flip the Lens: Is It Really Marriage You Fear?

Sometimes, it’s not the wedding or the partner or the label. It’s the uncertainty.

You’re scared of:

The irreversible nature of it
Losing autonomy
Ending up in a life you can’t emotionally exit

It’s like choosing a door without knowing what lies behind it. And if you’re a spiritual seeker, a deep thinker — you want to know. You want a soul-level connection, not just a societal stamp.

You don’t want marriage. You want sacred partnership. There’s a difference.

A Quick Energetic Check-In: The Solar Plexus & Root Chakra

In many of my Akashic Reading sessions, I find that those who fear marriage deeply often have blocked Solar Plexus (self-trust) or Root Chakra (safety) energies.

These chakras are responsible for:

Feeling anchored in your choices
Believing you can trust yourself
Knowing you can build a safe life

When they are out of balance, commitment feels unsafe. Not because of the person in front of you. But because your internal compass feels broken.

That’s why this isn’t always about the relationship. It’s about how safe you feel within your own body.

The Role of the Akashic Records

Now let’s talk about the soul layer.

In the Akashic Records, marriage often shows up not just as a contract, but as a karmic crossroad.

Some people fear marriage because of past-life betrayals.
Some fear losing power because in other timelines, they did.
Others feel blocked because this life is not meant to follow conventional paths — and the soul knows that.

I’ve had clients who, after an Akashic Reading, realized:

They were carrying ancestral guilt around love.
They had made vows of celibacy or spiritual solitude in past lives.
They were simply choosing from fear, not alignment.

The moment the root was seen, the resistance melted. Not because they forced themselves into marriage. But because they stopped forcing themselves out of their truth.

So, What Do You Do If You Feel This Way?

Here’s a soft guide:

1. Stop Shaming Your Fear

Fear is not failure. It’s feedback. Listen. Don’t suppress.

2. Write a Letter to Marriage

This might sound odd, but trust me. Write to “marriage” as if it’s a person.

Dear Marriage,
I’ve feared you. I’ve misunderstood you. Sometimes, I wanted you. Sometimes, I ran from you…

Let your heart speak.

3. Notice Your Triggers

What posts, movies, or conversations activate fear or defensiveness around marriage? That’s your goldmine of self-awareness.

4. Talk to Someone Safe

Not the aunt who nags or the friend who glamorizes. Someone who holds space. A coach. A therapist. Or a spiritual guide.

5. Try an Akashic Reading Session

If this resonates, consider exploring your soul records. Many clients have found profound relief in just understanding why their system says no.

Because once you understand the why, your how becomes clearer.

What If You Do Want Marriage, But You Just Don’t Feel Ready?

Then honor the in-between.

“I desire connection, but I also desire self-trust.”

You can want love and space. You can move slow. You can change your mind. You can co-create a relationship that evolves beyond social templates.

Sacred love isn’t found. It’s created. And you, my love, are allowed to be the artist of it.

Final Truth: You’re Not Too Broken To Be Loved

If you’ve feared marriage, please hear me: You are not broken. You are aware. You are brave enough to pause and question.

“Am I scared of marriage, or just of not being seen in it?” “Am I scared of being tied down, or of being tied to the wrong one?” “Do I fear losing love, or do I fear never finding myself in it?”

Let those questions guide you. Let your soul speak.

And when you’re ready to explore what your soul has to say about it — I’ll be here, holding space.

One Akashic Reading at a time. One truth at a time.

With love and reverence,

Neha Singla
Soul Journey Expert | Akashic Reader | India’s First Akashic Oracle Creator

P.S. I only open a few 1:1 Akashic Reading sessions a week. If this stirred something inside you, drop a comment saying “MARRIAGE”, and I’ll send you the details personally.